Last week, three beautiful new additions joined our family: two cats and a kitten.
Here’s Waffle:
Fudge:
And Marmalade, a last-minute impulse purchase, and who could blame me…?!
They’ve come into our lives in place of, but absolutely not replacing, our lovely Alfie, who we had to have put down a couple of months ago. We love cats and the house just hadn’t felt the same without a cat in it.
And now there are cats everywhere!
They’ve only been here for a week and already they’re bringing us so much joy (although it has taken me considerably longer to write this as Marmalade and Fudge are obsessed with my laptop and just want my attention).
It got me thinking about joy.
How much joy is actually in your life?
It sounds like such a simple question: what brings you joy?
But how often do we actually stop and think about it? And how many of us actually know?
When life is busy, joy can easily become something we think we’ll get around to later:
When work calms down.
When the kids are older.
When we’ve finished the never-ending list.
When we’ve got more money.
When we’ve got more energy.
When life is somehow a bit more… sorted.
But joy doesn’t have to mean a holiday, a day out or a perfectly planned experience.
Sometimes it lasts five minutes.
Joy snacks, meals and feasts
One of my clients recently created a list of things that bring them joy. I challenged them to take it a little further and think about their joy in three categories:
Joy snacks: little hits of joy that might only take a few minutes.
A favourite song. Standing outside with a cup of tea. Cuddling a pet. Dancing around the kitchen. Sending a ridiculous meme to someone who gets you. Sitting in the sun for five minutes and doing absolutely nothing useful.
Joy meals: things that might take an hour or two.
Going for a walk somewhere beautiful. Meeting a friend for coffee. Getting absorbed in something creative. Watching a film. Gardening. Going for a swim. Spending an afternoon pottering around a bookshop.
Joy feasts: things that might take a whole day or longer.
A day in the hills. A trip somewhere you love. A whole day devoted to a hobby. Spending uninterrupted time with people who make you feel most like yourself.
Then came the important part.
I challenged them to actually enact at least one.
Because knowing what brings us joy and actually making space for it are two different things.
Joy doesn’t have to be earned
I think many of us have unconsciously absorbed the idea that enjoyable things come after the important things.
We get the work done first. Sort everyone else out first. Finish the jobs first. Be productive first.
And then, if there’s any time or energy left, perhaps we’re allowed some joy.
The trouble is, there often isn’t anything left.
Particularly when we’re already overwhelmed, exhausted or feeling disconnected from ourselves, deliberately creating moments of joy can feel difficult. We can even dismiss the small things because they don’t seem significant enough to matter.
But those tiny moments count.
You don’t need an entire free day to experience something good.
Sometimes you just need a joy snack.
So, what brings you joy?
If you’re not sure, try making your own three lists:
My joy snacks: what can bring me a little spark of joy in five or ten minutes?
My joy meals: what do I love doing when I have an hour or two?
My joy feasts: if I had a whole day or longer, purely to do things that light me up, what would I choose?
Don’t think about what should bring you joy. Don’t choose things because they’re productive, impressive, healthy or what somebody else thinks you ought to enjoy.
What genuinely makes you feel good?
And then choose one.
Not someday. Not when everything else is finished.
See if you can add one small piece of joy to your life this week.
As for our new furry residents, I reckon they qualify as joy snacks, meals and feasts.
Although if Marmalade deletes this blog post before I manage to publish it, I reserve the right to temporarily revise that assessment.
What brings you joy?
I’d love to hear your joy snacks, meals and feasts – and I’ll undoubtedly be sharing more coaching thoughts (and cat content) soon. 🙂
And if this has resonated with you and you feel like your life is pretty devoid of joy right now, download my free guide, “12 Gentle Signs Your Inner Compass Is Trying To Tell You Something”: https://innermeridian.co.uk/guides/notice/
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